Monday, June 16, 2014


Someone has said that if anything is repeated often enough… even if it is a lie… it will be believed by many to be true.  This is certainly the case when it comes to divorce statistics.  For years now, we have heard about the 50 per cent divorce rate.  Some have asserted that the divorce rate is the same in the church.  LISTEN FRIENDS: THIS STATISTIC, REPORTED IN THE MEDIA AND REPRESENTED AS CONVENTIONAL WISDOM, IS SIMPLY NOT TRUE!  In fact, it is not even close to the truth.  Those who have shared this information in official communications and personal conversations are contributing to a deep sense of cultural discouragement about marriage.  It is discouragement that is based on a myth!
Half of all marriages are not ending in divorce.  According to the Census Bureau, 72 percent of those who have ever been married are still married to their first spouse!  And the 28 percent who aren’t includes everyone who was married for many years until a spouse died.  No one knows what the average first-marriage divorce rate is, but based on the rate of widowhood and other factors, we can estimate it is probably closer to 20-25 percent.  For all marriages [including second marriages] it is in the 31-35 percent range.
So-called expert demographers project that 40-50 percent of couples will get divorced – but it is important to remember that those are projections.  But, in fact, divorce rates continue to drop, not rise!  This good news, that most marriages last a lifetime, urgently needs to become conventional wisdom.  And the myth that must be debunked is the notion that the divorce rate is the same in the church.  The Barna Group studies focused on those with Christian and non-Christian belief systems and didn’t take worship attendance into account.  If a person was in church last week, their divorce rate dropped another 27 percent! Overall, regular church attendance lowers the divorce rate anywhere from 25-50 percent, depending on what study you looks at.  So as a pastor, I can confidently stand before our church and assert four truths:
1] “Faithfully attendance and involvement in church matters for your marriage!”
2] “Most people get through the hard times, and you can too.”
3] “Your liberal college professors who say, ‘Why bother getting married,’ and your impressionable young peers who are routinely living together have bought the lie.”
4] Divorce isn’t the greatest threat to marriage… discouragement is.”
Special thanks to Harvard-trained social researcher, Shaunti Feldman, for opening our eyes to the truth regarding marriage.
Special thanks to Andy Stanley for his new book, The Good News About Marriage, that sets the record straight.
Let’s talk it up.
Pray with me… Father God, all truth is Your truth, starting with Your Word and including the true truth that is out there in the marketplace today.  We know that Satan is the father of lies.  And his lies constantly seduce people to believe and practice that right is wrong and wrong is right.  If he can’t capture a soul with an assault on their morality, he will resort to his fallback strategy… discouragement.  We not ignorant of his ways and we resist him in the power of Jesus’ name.  Amen.

God Bless,
Pastor Ken

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